Are you hiring?

Written December 24th, 2008 by
Categories: CEO's Blog
Comments Off on Are you hiring?
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Well you should be!  I know these are the craziest economic times that we've seen in generations.  Even Toyota is going to report an operating loss this year for the first time in 70 years.

Cutting costs are top of mind and all spending is under close scrutiny. Toyota "has even unplugged electric hand dryers at some offices in an effort to cut costs". (You've got to be kidding me!)

But what if you could find and hire a Customer Service Representative (CSR) that has the following qualifications:

  • Ten years experience working in over 60 SAP manufacturers around the world.
  • Can be fully trained within 2-4 weeks of hiring.
  • Can work unsupervised in production within 60 days of hiring.
  • Willing to work shifts…ALL shifts.
  • Is multilingual.
  • Doesn't smoke, doesn't eat or drink…in fact, will never leave his desk for anything.
  • Loves to work in the dark.
  • Has the patience to deal with your most unsophisticated customers and is not offended by those that don't want to chit chat.
  • Has no kids or family to complain about.
  • Will never reveal any secrets to unauthorized personnel.
  • Will not take weekends or holidays off and doesn't enjoy vacations (or telling boring stories about them).
  • Has an identical twin that will fill in for him in case of emergencies.
  • Comes with his own "handler" who monitors his performance for you.
  • Loves to keep track of his work and prepares all sorts of reports for you.
  • Easily multitasks and can handle multiple customers at once.
  • Never complains about being trained to do new things.  Deliver invoices…no problem.  Take quotes…no problem.
  • Is pleasant to customers even when they're wrong and always tries to help them do the right thing.
  • Will never argue with you and will never talk back. Will only ask for a little recognition once in awhile :-).
  • Finally, is perfectly happy to do all the boring, mundane routine stuff so that their colleagues can take care of the really complicated stuff…like talking to people.

Imagine hiring this Super CSR and within 4 months of hiring he will become your top performing
CSR…by far.  He will process 2-3 times the revenue, 2-3 times the line items and
8-12 times the routine customer inquiries than their closest colleagues can.

All this and he'll only ask to make a little more money than one of your most senior CSRs per year. 

So…are you hiring?  You should be!

References furnished upon request.  No head hunter fees involved.